Response:

Hello! This #WebTortoise post was written 2013-APR-30 at 09:35 AM ET (about #WebTortoise).

Main Points

#- Here’s to the statisticians of the world!

Story

– Why did the statistician cross the road?
— He wasn’t sure.

– A statistician can have his head in an oven and his feet in ice, and he will say that on the average he feels fine (http://math.bnu.edu.cn/~chj/Statjokes.htm).

– A new government 10 year survey costing $3,000,000,000 revealed 3/4 of the people in America make up 75% of the population (http://www.ahajokes.com/m027.html).

– According to recent surveys, 51% of the people are in the majority (http://www.ahajokes.com/m027.html).

– Statistics play an important role in genetics. For instance, statistics prove that numbers of offspring is an inherited trait. If your parents didn’t have any kids, odds are you won’t either (One passed by Gary Ramseyer, taken from http://stats.stackexchange.com/questions/1337/statistics-jokes).

– Final Exam: A statistics major was completely hung over the day of his final exam. It was a true/false test, so he decided to flip a coin for the answers. The statistics professor watched the student the entire two hours as he was flipping the coin… writing the answer… flipping the coin… writing the answer. At the end of the two hours, everyone else had left the final except for the one student. The professor walks up to his desk and interrupts the student, saying, “Listen, I have seen that you did not study for this statistics test, you didn’t even open the exam. If you are just flipping a coin for your answer, what is taking you so long?”
The student replies bitterly (as he is still flipping the coin), “Shhh! I am checking my answers!” (http://math.bnu.edu.cn/~chj/Statjokes.htm)

– Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital (Aaron Levenstein, taken from http://www.workjoke.com/statisticians-jokes.html).

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